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The astrology of family dynamics

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    • #6853
      Faith
      Facilitator

      I’m interested to hear from any circle members who have explored their family dynamics in depth using an astrological framework. What tools did you use (e.g. synastry, composite charts, tracking of transits and progressions etc), what did you discover and how were you able to improve your relationships with family members through your learning.

      I think this is a really interesting area of astrology as I believe that at some level we choose our family of origin and that these relationships are thus crucial to fulfiling our highest potential in this lifetime. Relationships with mother and father are of course fundamental but sibling relationships are also very important. The synastry between family members can be quite dramatic, especially exact conjunctions between personal planets and points. Please share if you have experience in this area.

    • #6859
      AnhP
      Mentor

      @admin, this topic concerns an issue that’s been of considerable importance in my personal growth. I have attempted to find ways to understand how my natal chart and the charts of my family members come together to create the family dynamics that make up our collective heritage.

      At this point, I’m just beginning to learn about advanced tools (such as synastry, progressions and composite charts, etc.) and how to use them for understanding relationship dynamics. So far, I’ve mainly tried to see in my mind’s eye how my natal chart and others’ natal chart constellations interact and influence the way we relate to each other in life. Even so, that’s helped me clarify somewhat why/how relating to one person doesn’t work the same way as when I relate to another person in my family.

      Of course, I’m still looking to expand my understanding in this area to use the advanced astrological tools for transcending the personality level family dynamics, in order to apply the knowledge of “all is one” more seamlessly when I relate to people in my immediate family and the human family at large.

    • #6861
      Iratxe Mendi
      Participant

      Hello back @admin @anhp and all,

      Related to this topic, these past days I’ve reconnected to an experience that came through during the summer, as I was listening to Jessica Diruzza’s podcast on Family dynamics https://trustpsyche.com/podcast/ (before Jessica Garfield-Kabbara…I’ve already shared and recommended some of her work in this forum. Streams 2 and 3 are dedicated to family dynamics, you might want to check. Quite worthy, indeed.

      So, tapping into the first stream, a healing thread between me and my father opened up (awareness, beauty, forgiveness…) – and then, later on, it re-opened and re-weaved to include his mother. We all share a Moon Neptune Venus complex I hadn’t seen until I listened to it. In his case, there is this MoonVenus conjunction (out of sing) from 10-11th houses squaring Neptune in the second house. In my chart, VenusNeptune conjunction in the tenth inconjunct Moon in the sixth – Moon and Venus OOB. His OOB Venus exact conjunct my OOB Moon in Gemini and his Neptune exact conjunct my Mars Virgo 29 (conjunct Pluto). And, as I say, this complex is also there, in a different configuration in my grandmother’s chart for which I don’t have the exact birth time. In her case Mars is not involved, although wait…her Chiron is exact conjunct my father’s Pisces Mars…

      I guess (hope) that, even if hard to write it down, the weavy picture starts to unfold here.

      There is something connected with the feminine that I always sensed was being carried from his side. A wound and a treasure. He hasn’t been able to bring to life that sacred space, that treasure, this deep need-ocean. Cultural restrictions, familial conditioning, etc. Here too, there is this wall or blanket in the way: it has not been well integrated into the here and now, and it is just needed (Pisces house II and more).

      There is a wound that has appeared in the past (in various healing sessions), a thread that comes from my grandmother, through him, to “me”. Connected with many abortions she had to endure and that my father witnessed and carried inside. This truly and even neatly connects with my own womb experience…

      That day I also discovered he carries the “Hades Moon”: Pluto_Moon inconjunct, tight. And so, for me, this “mark” comes from both sides: my mother’s ScorpioChiron Moon and father’s PlutoMoon. And I am the only one in the family (siblings) carrying this imprint.

      Both in this case and in other family correlations I have encountered, in the beginning I have felt the healing, the beauty; but then, the actual manifestation is quite slow. This can be connected to my SaturnRx IC Taurus. Actually, This Saturn Rx Taurus fourth house signifies that honoring and healing these family dynamics is essential for the unfoldment of the authentic self. And again, I sense that the timing and unfolding of the actual healing cannot and should not be forced by any kind of egoic approach – spiritual ego and so on. Endurance.

      Hoping this information helps you both for your own research – not sure if I already shared some of it here or there in the past…-

      Warm regards.

    • #6862
      Iratxe Mendi
      Participant

      Hello back @admin @anhp and all,

      Related to this topic, these past days I’ve reconnected to an experience that came through during the summer, as I was listening to Jessica Diruzza’s podcast on Family dynamics https://trustpsyche.com/podcast/ (before Jessica Garfield-Kabbara…I’ve already shared and recommended some of her work in this forum. Streams 2 and 3 are dedicated to family dynamics, you might want to check. Quite worthy, indeed.

      So, tapping into the first stream, a healing thread between me and my father opened up (awareness, beauty, forgiveness…) – and then, later on, it re-opened and re-weaved to include his mother. We all share a Moon Neptune Venus complex I hadn’t seen until I listened to it. In his case, there is this MoonVenus conjunction (out of sing) from 10-11th houses squaring Neptune in the second house. In my chart, VenusNeptune conjunction in the tenth inconjunct Moon in the sixth – Moon and Venus OOB. His OOB Venus exact conjunct my OOB Moon in Gemini and his Neptune exact conjunct my Mars Virgo 29 (conjunct Pluto). And, as I say, this complex is also there, in a different configuration in my grandmother’s chart for which I don’t have the exact birth time. In her case Mars is not involved, although wait…her Chiron is exact conjunct my father’s Pisces Mars…

      I guess (hope) that, even if hard to write it down, the weavy picture starts to unfold here.

      There is something connected with the feminine that I always sensed was being carried from his side. A wound and a treasure. He hasn’t been able to bring to life that sacred space, that treasure, this deep need-ocean. Cultural restrictions, familial conditioning, etc. Here too, there is this wall or blanket in the way: it has not been well integrated into the here and now, and it is just needed (Pisces house II and more).

      There is a wound that has appeared in the past (in various healing sessions), a thread that comes from my grandmother, through him, to “me”. Connected with many abortions she had to endure and that my father witnessed and carried inside. This truly and even neatly connects with my own womb experience…

      That day I also discovered he carries the “Hades Moon”: Pluto_Moon inconjunct, tight. And so, for me, this “mark” comes from both sides: my mother’s ScorpioChiron Moon and father’s PlutoMoon. And I am the only one in the family (siblings) carrying this imprint.

      I have to admit that, both in this case and in other family correlations I have encountered, in the beginning I have felt the healing, the beauty; but then, the actual manifestation is quite slow. This can be connected to my SaturnRx IC Taurus. Actually, This Saturn Rx Taurus fourth house signifies that honoring and healing these family dynamics is just essential for the unfoldment of the authentic self. And again, I sense that the timing and unfolding of the healing cannot and should not be forced by any kind of egoic approach – spiritual ego and so on. Endurance :)

      Hoping this information helps you both for your own research – not sure if I already shared some of it here or there in the past…-

      Warm regards.

      • #6895
        Faith
        Facilitator

        Thanks for sharing this story of repeating patterns @iratxe. It’s so common in families for themes of learning to flow from one generation to the next like a thread that links us together. As you suggest, these threads may be weakened or even broken by our cultural conditioning, and so astrology can be extremely helpful for helping us reconnect with these important aspects of our selves and our heritage.

        It’s interesting to me that you say ‘in the beginning I have felt the healing, the beauty; but then, the actual manifestation is quite slow’. It reminds me that often when we set an intention in thought or word it needs to be strengthened over and over by affirmation before it can override our old conditioning and change our external reality. Something for me to take away today… X Faith

    • #6868
      AnhP
      Mentor

      I have found that cultural conditioning helped me perpetuate unhealthy family dynamics, at least until my first Saturn return. I started becoming aware of it and questioning why I had to remain in servitude to that conditioning, only when I hit my mid-30’s. Just as @Iratxe notes, forcing a healing did not work for me. The various aspects of the healing process have been unfolding on their own terms, within timing beyond my conscious control. The only way I have managed to deal with the “gifts” of my family dynamics is to cultivate faith, and remain grateful and patient.

      • #6897
        Faith
        Facilitator

        @anhp Agreed Anahit! These dynamics can take a very long time to shift. I know with my mother that there was a need for almost constant separation at the beginning to break away from old habits and conditioning. Now, twenty years later, we have a good relationship and discuss openly when old ways of behaving come up, for example when one or the other of us is under stress.

        Because I was experiencing the transit of Pluto over my Sun, Moon and Venus during both their births, I know that my daughters are going to trigger me strongly throughout my life, and that issues of power, control and attachment will feature strongly in our dynamics. That sounds like a lot of fun don’t you think?! But I know too that they have and will continue to transform my life.

        I think a difficult aspect pattern with a family member is very much like a triggering outer planet transit: it can be incredibly difficult but it forces us to change in ways that are ultimately positive. The only thing that can really go wrong is when we refuse to acknowledge our role in a dynamic, to take responsibility, and instead play the victim or blame game. Then things get stuck and great unhappiness is the result.

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